Life and Satire Inch Closer

Sadly, just one of the stories below is parody. Without clicking, can you guess which one it is?

1) The Beastie Boys install a virus that damages the computers of fans who try to rip MP3s from their new CD.

2) RIAA sues vehicle owners who share radio music with passengers.

3) Orin Hatch wants to criminalize P2P software under a theory of"inducement." And he wants to do it"for the children." Says Hatch:"In the film 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang,' the leering 'Child Catcher' lured children into danger with false promises of 'free lollipops. Tragically, some corporations now seem to think that they can legally profit by inducing children to steal; that they can legally lure children and others with false promises of 'free music.'"

4) Campaign finance reform supporter Michael Moore could be banned from promoting his movie after July 30 because of campaign finance reform.

5) Your"War on Drugs" White House wants to implement a federally-funded, nationwide screening program for mental illness that would identify cases in childhood, then recommend pharmaceutical remedies sold by campaign donors. The program's Orwellian name:"The New Freedom Initiative."