Birdie Buggery

This is just sick and wrong. Heaven's sake, is no corner of earth safe from gay propaganda?

Given our trash culture, and the way the homosexuals have been pushing their agenda down our throats, I suppose it was inevitable that the"alternative lifestyle" mindset would soon enough take root in the animal world.

Now that it has, I can't emphasize how very important it is that Roy and Silo be ostracized, shunned, and perhaps even banished from the penguin community, lest their sick love taint, corrupt, and forever alter the Antarctic wildlife family structure.

Oh sure, it's just these two male penguin"partners" today. But if the rest of the penguins, nay the entire sub-zero ice shelf biosphere, grows tolerant of this kind of lascivious, amoral sexual liscentiousness, we're on a very short, very slippery slope (pun fully intended) to the day when the last pristine, natural, unsoiled spot on earth degenerates into some radical, free-love, Provincetown-on-ice.

Are you ready for Otters Gone Wild? Unnatural, walrus-on-polar-bear sex orgies? Manatee bath houses?

You'd better be.

Here's hoping the penguin community does the right thing, and shuns the sodomites right out of the colony. Sadly, that probably won't hapen. And in just a few years, we'll no sooner allow our children to watch the Discovery Channel than we'd allow them to watch"Queer as Folk."