Harry Mount: Mark Lowe is right: The Romans said it better
[Amo, Amas, Amat and All That – How to Become a Latin Lover' by Harry Mount is published by Short Books (£7.99)]
Next time you curse a flashing speed camera or are undertaken on the inside lane of the M40, here's a little tip: say your rude words in Latin. That's what Mark Lowe, the millionaire hedge-fund boss being sued for wrongful dismissal, did when he sent an email quoting one of the filthiest expressions ever written in Latin – or in any other language, for that matter.
Ariane Gordji, a young woman seeking work experience, had asked Mr Lowe, an Oxford classics graduate, the meaning of: "Ego autem dico vobis: diligite inimicos vestros, benefacite his qui oderunt vos."
It's actually from the New Testament (Matthew 5:44) and means, "But I say to you: love your enemies; be kind to those who hate you." Mr Lowe didn't bother with a translation and instead answered with a chunk of Catullus's Carmina (or "songs"), which is so sexually explicit that it wasn't openly published in English until the late 20th century.
"Irrumabo vos et pedicabo vos," wrote Mr Lowe, before kindly adding, "It's Catullus, not very polite."
Too right, it's not polite; in fact it's so rude that the English translation still can't be printed in a family newspaper without using dashes. For those of a sensitive disposition, turn away now. Even with dashes, it's pretty graphic stuff – "I will b----- you and face-f--- you."
Mr Lowe may or may not be the most enlightened of bosses. Another young woman, the one suing him for claiming he hounded her out of her job, also claims he brought prostitutes to business functions and made her attend strip clubs.
But I'm with him when it comes to Catullus. As he said in court, Catullus's poetry "is not vile. It's burlesque. It was always light-hearted in the first century and it is now."
The poem was indeed a light-hearted skit, aimed at two critics of Catullus's verse: "Aureli pathice et cinaede Furi". More dashes, I'm afraid; this means, "----sucker Aurelius and catamite Furius." ...
... But the Latin itself wasn't rude to someone who couldn't understand it. That's one of the wonders of Latin – and why you should use it on the speed camera or that fool driver careening down the inside lane. Because it's a dead language, understood by only a few Latin fans, and because it's drenched in high-minded, august connotations, you can describe the most degraded sexual act, and most people will think you're quoting from Virgilian epic poetry
in iambic hexameters.
There is no other language quite like Latin that can pull this off. An obscenity in a modern, living language would be too close to the bone. An insult in another dead language – say, ancient Greek or Assyrian – would simply be too obscure. No wonder, then, that Latin crops up the whole time as a supple device for advertising your wit, intelligence or evasiveness...
Read entire article at Telegraph (UK)
Next time you curse a flashing speed camera or are undertaken on the inside lane of the M40, here's a little tip: say your rude words in Latin. That's what Mark Lowe, the millionaire hedge-fund boss being sued for wrongful dismissal, did when he sent an email quoting one of the filthiest expressions ever written in Latin – or in any other language, for that matter.
Ariane Gordji, a young woman seeking work experience, had asked Mr Lowe, an Oxford classics graduate, the meaning of: "Ego autem dico vobis: diligite inimicos vestros, benefacite his qui oderunt vos."
It's actually from the New Testament (Matthew 5:44) and means, "But I say to you: love your enemies; be kind to those who hate you." Mr Lowe didn't bother with a translation and instead answered with a chunk of Catullus's Carmina (or "songs"), which is so sexually explicit that it wasn't openly published in English until the late 20th century.
"Irrumabo vos et pedicabo vos," wrote Mr Lowe, before kindly adding, "It's Catullus, not very polite."
Too right, it's not polite; in fact it's so rude that the English translation still can't be printed in a family newspaper without using dashes. For those of a sensitive disposition, turn away now. Even with dashes, it's pretty graphic stuff – "I will b----- you and face-f--- you."
Mr Lowe may or may not be the most enlightened of bosses. Another young woman, the one suing him for claiming he hounded her out of her job, also claims he brought prostitutes to business functions and made her attend strip clubs.
But I'm with him when it comes to Catullus. As he said in court, Catullus's poetry "is not vile. It's burlesque. It was always light-hearted in the first century and it is now."
The poem was indeed a light-hearted skit, aimed at two critics of Catullus's verse: "Aureli pathice et cinaede Furi". More dashes, I'm afraid; this means, "----sucker Aurelius and catamite Furius." ...
... But the Latin itself wasn't rude to someone who couldn't understand it. That's one of the wonders of Latin – and why you should use it on the speed camera or that fool driver careening down the inside lane. Because it's a dead language, understood by only a few Latin fans, and because it's drenched in high-minded, august connotations, you can describe the most degraded sexual act, and most people will think you're quoting from Virgilian epic poetry
in iambic hexameters.
There is no other language quite like Latin that can pull this off. An obscenity in a modern, living language would be too close to the bone. An insult in another dead language – say, ancient Greek or Assyrian – would simply be too obscure. No wonder, then, that Latin crops up the whole time as a supple device for advertising your wit, intelligence or evasiveness...